Some motherly advice for Mother’s Day

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By Kelly Hockenberry, Columnist, The Times

Every once in awhile I like to pose questions on my Facebook page to entice my friends to (essentially) write my article for me. Listen, I’ll cop to it. My brain is old and crowded and sometimes it’s hard to be creative on a weekly basis. Give a girl a break…especially since it’s Mother’s Day.

So, I asked “OK gals and guys, what is the best fashion advice you have gotten from your mother?” And, as always, my buddies came through with some pretty hilarious maternal words of wisdom. Thanks all!

Oh, p.s…I never promised not to name names. (whoopsie)

First and foremost, I really should list all of the people who “liked” my post but never wrote a comment. They were just lurking around reading the statements of the brave souls who followed my directions.

Shame on you.

Now, I’m REALLY curious what your mommas had to say! Of course, my sister was the first to respond to let everyone know that my mother always encourages us to apply a little make-up before leaving the house. This was reiterated by my mother’s sister, who was quoting my grandmother, that every girl can use a “little rouge.”

In a nutshell, this is multi-generational advice. As I have stated in previous articles, I enthusiastically agree. Otherwise, how do you differentiate going out from staying in?

Things that make you go “hmmmmmm”. My girlfriends Amanda, Liz, and Tricia have an amazingly profound mother who is a straight shooter when it comes to fashion advice. She is not a fan of high-waisted shorts because “they make your behind the shape of a toilet seat.” I nosed my water when I read that one. I’ll never look at this particular style the same way ever again.

And secondly, halter tops “leave little to the imagination” and that is NOT a good thing. Amen, Louise!

There were several comments about the necessity of having proper undergarments, such as: wear clean underwear (thanks, Lynn). After having boys, this sentence, unfortunately, has passed my lips more than once.

Cover your cleavage (thanks, Patti) and practice bending over in a dress to make sure it’s not too short (love that one, Ryan) All worthwhile tips, don’t you agree?

Joe K’s mom was an iron shamer whose patent line “where are you going? I hope it’s Wrinkle City because you’ll fit right in” made me laugh out loud. Partly because I have searched my whole life for Wrinkle City because I HATE TO IRON.

I love that Amy’s dad was the fashion guru in her house and his saying “look classy not trashy” sounds like a PSA that should run at the bottom of every social media post. Chrissy, thank you for “just because it fits doesn’t mean you should wear it.” Brilliant.

Caitlin posted that her mom recommends having painted toenails during sandal season. Y-E-S. I shudder at the thought of bare toes.

Sharon and Kelly both commented that they don’t necessarily remember receiving direct fashion advice from their mothers, simply an overall sense that they were free to make their own choices (ill advised as they may have been. Afterall, it WAS the 80’s).

And Andrea’s mother followed suit with the warning “nothing good ever happens past midnight” regardless of what you’re wearing! Betty took me back to my high school years by reminding me that there was a short-lived fad when girls were wearing boxer shorts AS shorts. Her mother (wisely) put her foot down on this trend. I remember being allowed to do this as a bathing suit cover-up…but, that’s it. What were we thinking?????

Mom really does know best. So, shower her with the love and attention she deserves on this day and ALL days!

Happy Mother’s Day

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